How not to reproduce

How to confuse your target audience

So I love ads that make no sense whatsoever. Case in point, here's a lovely example I just encountered online. Do you know your credit score? Well, I don't but this seems to only be targeted toward gummi bears. Are you a gummi bear with bad credit? No big deal! See, the gummi bear with excellent credit has the same smile on his face as the gummi bear with the bad credit. So why advertise? Obviously these bears could care less if they're up to their gummi asses in debt.

How to make the best yahoo answers post ever

So first read the question. What? Then see wally's answer (he's Jason). This is when I laughed so hard I was tearing, bright red, and my boss walked by my office.



Brad's comment after reading this "Laughed so hard I almost relaxed myself."

How to live in Maryland: Part 3

Wally used the blog last week to check the weather. So it's only fair I update for this week's forecast. Watch out! Today we're being attacked by a cloud with three legs!

How to "own" A.L.I.C.E.

How not to apply to grad school

I always mess these things up ><

"Dear sir, you accidentally selected the MBA program instead of the Communications program. I have fixed this problem for you, please let me know if there's anything else I can assist you with"

How to find hell on earth.

It's on ebay!

How to write a retarded letter.

So I found this awesome site that takes what you write and makes it "unintelligent." Check it out, here is my normal letter to Wally:

Dear Wally,
How are you? Man, today was a busy day. Fortunately I get to leave a little early because my groceries are being delivered. Anyway, how was your day? I wish I was asleep right now instead of staring at this stupid computer. Catch you later!


And here is it once I hit the "moron" button:

dear wally,
hao am yall? mann, 2dae wuz an busy dai. fortunately i get too leave littel earl baceause miy groceries is beeun delivered. newae, hao been ur dae? i wish i wuz asleep rite nao instade o' staring @ tihs stupid cmoputr. kach joo latr!


The link is: unintelligencer.com

How to live in Maryland: Part 2

I did an experiment and looked up the weather at the same time I did yesterday. The forecast has changed dramatically! Which means anything is possible. Yesterday's prediction of today is dead on but Saturday....what the heck happened to Saturday's forecast! I'm scared. Hold me.

How to live in Maryland

This is the most boring weather forecast EVER. Is it winter? Is it spring? I know, it's Sprinter!

How to design video game cases

Apparently there is a formula to designing a video game case.
Step 1: Put lead male testosterone character on front with mouth open.
Step 2: Put title of game on bottom.
Step 3: ??????
Step 4: Profit.

See example.


I screencapped this from gamestop.com, it appears as is. No photoshopping!

How to advertise to no one