How to vent frustration

Just letting everyone know....

http://www.dearbulkmailer.com/

How to draw Johnny Depp ten years later

So ten years ago I painted edward scissorhands and I figured hey, I have 10 minutes to kill I will draw johnny depp again. However, I haven't drawn in quite some time so this is what it ended up looking like. The first one is the rough sketch and the second one is the magic of photoshop doing all my shading for me because I'm too lazy to sharpen my pencil. Man I still draw like an eighteen year old. oh well.

How to make an awesome fat joke

Heremeow: now i'm watching Biggest Loser where they are showing fat people who got skinny and are now hot
Heremeow: some of these people lost like 90 pounds
CorbeledG: Hmmmm I can't think up a good joke, so I'll just say I hate rachael

How to discover the meaning of your screenname

MY NAME IS CORBELEDG WHICH MEANS I HAVE AN UNHEALTHY FASINATION WITH BRICKS. SO WHAT?????

How To Be Ambitious by...bah, fuck it

So Britney's lil' sister is in trouble...pregnant trouble. She was knocked up before she had a hit single which has really pissed off her mother because now she may have to pay for this child. Instead, she is taking the blame out on the boy who impregnated her less-talented daughter and claiming he raped her since he is 18 and no-talent Spears is 16. I say be nice to the boy because chances are, he will be getting custody of the child. So me and Wally were talking about the Spears family and this is what happened.

Heremeow: man can you believe the mother has actually written parenting books hahaha
Wally: LOL I know! lmao
Heremeow: that's like me writing a book about car maintence
Heremeow: or Driving Tips by Kim
Wally: Staying Off Craft by Wally
Wally: hey this is pretty fun
Heremeow: Growing Bamboo by Wally
Heremeow: Getting A Good Night's Sleep by Kim
Heremeow: Sex for Dummies by.... oh noes
Wally: OMG
Wally: LOL

Wally: I hope I have some time today...because if I do I'm totally doing an awesome photoshop
Heremeow: yes!!!!! book covers!
Heremeow: man you should work for the daily show's graphic design department
Wally: hahahahahahha that would be awesome you writing and me drawing stuff
Heremeow: man i wish we were ambitious
Heremeow: instead of like being the type of people who are only amitious enough to try stuff we know we're going to fail at so that we really don't have to do it
Wally: How To Be Ambitious by...bah, fuck it

How to make Kim laugh so hard she almost gets fired

CAUTION: SPOILER ALERT

Okay so Sweeney Todd kills his wife without realizing it. Then, omg, she's dying in his arms and he's like "fawk I just killed my wife." This is a shot from the movie (with english subtitles)

How to get Owned by Your PC

My name is Wally, and I make grammer errors. But look at this error I got on my computer (I included some of the background so people could tell that yes, this error really happened on my computer)

How to Structure a Burtonesque London Bridge

Heeeeeere's Johnny! No, really. He's here, or he will be on Wednesday, December 5. By "Johnny," of course, we mean the man better known to fans of Pirates of the Caribbean and 21 Jump Street as Johnny Depp; and by "here" we mean right here in Moviefone's studios, answering your questions with director Tim Burton as part of our Unscripted interview series.

Depp is starring in one of the most anticipated films of the season, and that's Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street, the Stephen Sondheim musical that's finally getting the lavish on-screen treatment it's due. At the helm is frequent Depp collaborator Tim Burton; and if you've ever been lucky enough to catch the musical, you'll know that Burton is perfect to direct the dark and twisted tale of Sweeney Todd (Depp), "the demon barber of Fleet Street," who, with the help of his landlady (Helena Bonham Carter), kills people and bakes them into scrumptious meat pies. It's sort of like Waitress except with killing, crazier hair ... and singing!

There's been a ton of Oscar talk around the movie, Depp, Burton and Bonham Carter, and now's your chance to interrogate both Depp and Burton for yourself. Hit Captain Jack and, uh, Mr. Burton with whatever you're dying to know, then check back the week of December 17 to see if your question made it on the air.

To submit a question, you can leave it here in the comments, or you can text one to AskCelebs@aol.com (brought to you by Verizon Wireless). Please provide your first name and your city and state, and if you're looking for inspiration, then take a look at some of our past Unscripted interviews here. Good luck!


The following is an article at Cinematical